This morning was my yoga class and I found myself in the standing scissor pose. I actually enjoy this pose because it is a balance challenge. And today my standing balance poses (I already forgot their names..) weren’t very good, which is unusual. So I reminded myself that I was practicing yoga. That helped.
This past week was very stressful, unbeknown to me. It was actually very stressful for Tony as he had a great deal of responsibility preparing for a local firefighters funeral procession. Two Kilgore firefighters died last Sunday during a training exercise. Sad. Just sad. He had to go in on his days off to continue to put the process together. Nacodoches and Lewisville firefighters came in to help assist. Great group of folks and despite the grief, it was a good experience and Tony functions well in that environment. But it’s been hard. Hard.
I thought I was doing pretty well, until I started trying to figure out why I was snacking on anything that didn’t eat me first after everybody went to bed. I’d stopped that habit sometime ago. What’s the deal? Well, by the 4th day (which was after the funeral procession we attended), it dawned on me – I was stressed. I guess it was easy to hide it since the kids keep me busy. And I was unconciously handling it with food. Ugh. So today in Yoga as I was in several twisting poses, I wrung out the fear – the fear of “what if” questions. What if something happened to Tony? And I’m sure there are more what if’s. So I wrung them out – and let them fall to the floor, recognizing that whatever “what if” actually occured in my life that my Heavenly Father would be at the beginning, middle and end of the “what if” occuring.
The “what if?” has happened to these two fireman’s families. And He is in the middle of it all.
On a lighter note, I made cupcakes today with “Baker Sam.” It can almost send me over the edge working with him in the kitchen – how do you control two hands that are not your own??? HA! But is was fun and they were soooo good. And more than it being fun, it makes Sammy happy when we work together on a “project.” We made strawberry cupcakes with strawberry icing. Yum. Yum. Yum. is what Sawyer Wayne said. They are even good without icing.
It’s late. And I’m determined to get up early/on time so we won’t be late to church!