God in Me!

So this is how it went down.  Boys were up at 6:30 this morning (I’d been awake since 4:30; made them stay in there room until 7am and I’d had my coffee.  This morning was BSF (Bible Study Fellowship), which is usually on Wednesday, but holiday week pushed it up a day.  These are generally easy mornings for us as the boys LOVE going to BSF as well as I.  They are tired when we depart from BSF, we pick up lunch, come home and they have to finish cleaning their room and doing their kitchen chore.   They generally eat and play outside while I veg inside for a bit before it’s time to come in.  Rest time is a MUST on BSF days.  At present, school is not a priority on this day, unless we squeeze some in after rest time. 

SO, it’s rest time in our house.  I can tell I’ve got some tired boys on my hands.  I’m tired but I’m not melting yet, although ready for MY nap!  Oldest starts getting grumpy and mouthy while we’re trying to put his bed back together (linen washing day) and by the time he’s snuggled under the covers he’s said “I’m tired of you” and something else I can’t remember…..but hurtful and unnecessary, nonetheless. 

I’ve been meditating on the Love Chapter in 1 Corinthians 13 – back to the basics is what I like to call it.  I’ve been reading it each morning and usually stick around “Love is patient.  Love is kind.  It is not easily angered. ”  Today I added on “Love is not self-seeking.”  So, basically, love is self-less.  Anyhow.  I continue to thank God for His Spirit in ME that I can be patient, kind and not easily angered – and thank you for the opportunties you (God) continue to present that allow HE and I to walk that out – mainly in my home! 

So today, as my ears heard these unkind words from my child, instead of being “easily angered” as I had been in the past, and could have responded differently (’cause I’m human and sensed those things rising and about to bubble forth), I walked away and recalled God’s word that I’d been meditating on – walked back in his room and gently touched him, told him I loved him and to have a good rest with a smile, and asked if I could give him a hug, which he declined…until youngest wanted a hug – and then he was ready for one 🙂 

As I came into the kitchen, I realized I’d just experienced God’s transforming grace in ME.  And rejoiced.  And wrote it down in my journal, thanking Him for His goodness to make me into His instrument of love to my children.  It wasn’t difficult.  It was HIM.  And my boy experienced HIM.  And for that, I exhault HIM and bless HIS Name.


Surviving “no naps”

It was 8:41 pm when I walked out of the boys room – both asleep. Last night it was 8:32 pm. When they do nap (like on a Sunday) they don’t go to sleep until 10:30pm and that makes for a l.o.n.g. day. I can’t remember what happened on Monday night, but I had them up around 7am and they were getting cranky at Noon, at which point I fed them, read to them and we snuggled down in my bed for an hour and half nap!

I’ve been toying with “no naps” even before the holidays. It’s SO easy to go back to napping! Sometimes I don’t sleep well and I need a nap! My youngest (3 in three weeks!) could probably still use a nap, but he doesn’t want to miss anything! One thing I did try was having oldest rest on his bed with a book while I put youngest down for a nap (who likes for me to “lay down me” for him to go to sleep). This worked sometimes and Sammy and I would go do some school work and then take 30 minutes to rest (which Sammy usually fell asleep). And sometimes (when I wanted it to and even when I didn’t), Sammy would fall asleep reading his book! And Monday, I tried waking up Sammy after an hour nap – he woke up, changed positions, and went back to sleep for another 30 minutes!

So these past few days have been fairly easy to work through our afternoon “lull.” Tuesday we had organic produce co-op pick-up at 2:30, and errand, and then I took us to the park for park and bike riding time. Today we had to run a lunch into town for Dad. We’d made ourselves a picnic for the park but it was SO COLD (due to wind and no sun) that I couldn’t finish my lunch! The kids had already ran off without finishing their lunch, knowing their time was short! We’ll return on a day that the sun is out. So we picked up some Wendy’s chili on the way home, ate, I did some clothes folding while the kids played, and then I joined in for some block playing. We snuggled in a big chair for 30 minutes of Sense and Sensibility, then it was time for me to do some kitchen work. And surprisingly, the meltdowns we had encountered previously trying no naps haven’t popped up. I was on the verge of one today, but reigned myself in! LOL!

So here we are. Trying. Highly grateful for more peaceful bedtimes (for they have not always been this way even BEFORE trying no naps). To continue to survive, I hope to plan a walk to see our neighborhood horse we feed carrots to, do some art (I’m still working up the courage to do finger paints…), go see relatives, read, read, read our library books, play a game.

I think we’re going to make it.

Back to the basics

Last night I was blessed to have a Mom’s Time Out with my ML friends.  I had about an hour spare time, so I headed to Starbucks and took out my Bible, asking Father for HELP!  My responses to my Sammy had not been God-honoring the past several days.  I apologized to him before we left, but knew I needed Father’s direction.  So He and I went to 1 Corinthians 13 – the LOVE chapter! 

So I’m back to the basics.  Love is patient.  Love is kind.

Although I had apologized to Sammy, that wasn’t enough.  I was delighted to sit down with him and let him know I’d met with Father and showed him the scripture He had directed me to, confessing that Momma had not been patient nor kind, but that she wanted to be because she loves God and she loved him.  He seemed to be quite receptive to the process Mom went through to make things right with God and right with him.

I don’t like messing up, but since I do it fairly often, I guess I better get used to it!  My hope and prayer is that my children see me running to Father, unashamedly approaching His throne of grace.  He is faithful to forgive when we confess. 

Thanking Father for all that transpires to allow me the opportunity to practice patience and kindness, demonstrating His love to my children through these attributes.  I have already had opportunity this morning as I’ve battled a neighbor’s runaway dog, shaving cream, toothpaste, a fish hook in a batman cape, and a 2 year old that continues to have to poo-poo whenever I decide it’s time to start school!

Velvet Ants and Lizards

Well, my last post was when our baseball player headed back to Oklahoma b/c of an injury.  We have moved on, but still speak fondly of “our Chad.”  It has made going to the baseball games not as important, but we still try to get there since Daddy is there doing security. 

I’ve been busy with all-things boys.  Our recent excursions to Elder Park (Kilgore) and our walk down the street to the pond has netted us some wonderful experiences with nature.  My favorite being the turtles and dragon flies.  However, Saturday I got to see the MOST HILARIOUS sight!  My Sammy chasing a lizard – Sammy finally won and caught him, but he gave such a good chase!  I have never seen a lizard run so fast!  Sammy had the pleasure of continuing our walk around Elder lake with him.  He tried to make a few escapes, but without success.  In fact, I could have sworn he was dead – but he was only playing “possum”, my guess, in hopes that Sammy would put him down.  He made it past the trail marker into the forest on our last leg of the trail.  Sammy was sad, but I assured him that Mr. Lizard would be quite content among the forest creatures.

Yesterday our neighbors came to play and the boys were ferouciously stepping on a huge black and red ant.  So last night I had plans for Sammy to try to draw his first nature experience as we talked about the many animals, creatures, or trees we’d talked about.  (Yesterday we took a good look at a 6 ft. pine tree and engaged our sight, touch and smell!).  So we decided to look up on the internet what the red and black ant was.  And to our delight we found out it is a Velvet ant, which, actually isn’t an ant at all, but a wingless wasp that can deal a mighty sting!  So I wrote down it’s name, scientific name and pertinent facts that Sammy was later able to answer questions about.  Then I set my computer on the table so he could look at it and try to draw it.  I could tell he didn’t know quite where to start, so I guided him through the parts of the “ant” and he did a splendid job!  When I figure out how to scan, I hope to post it.

This experience gave me much encouragement.  Despite the fact that the other day I had to “pull teeth” to get Sammy to recognize the letter S!!! 

I remember when I was at seminary that I had this “feeling” that I would some day do something great – beyond myself.  I thought perhaps it would come as I served as my church’s prayer ministry coordinator – a position I dearly enjoyed and whole-heartedly devoted myself to.  Yet, after leaving the position to come home to raise Sammy, I wondered if  I had achieved anything “special.” 

As Father  “side-swiped” me several months ago with the idea of homeschooling, I have embraced it.  Where there was a “wall”, I allowed Him to place a “door” for me to crack open and gently consider the possibility.  It has been a wonderful thought process.  Although my Love probably still thinks I’m crazy (his immediate response), he whole-heartedly supports me in this. 

So it dawned on me last night after doing some reading in A Pocketful of Pinecones.  After I’d gone to bed and was praying/thinking, I realized after my drawing experience with Sammy that he had my undivided attention.  He was in a classroom of 1:1.  Not 1:20.  This was exciting to me! 

I know full well it will not be easy.  But I am delighted at my Heavenly Father’s idea for me to homeschool.  When I sensed he was leading in this direction, I told my analytical self that it mattered not the pros and cons, although I have discussed, read and prayed about those things.  But what mattered was that I was obedient to whatever He was asking of me. 

I look forward to recording the journey.  And of soon introducing our “school mascot” and his name!

He tends his flock like shepherd

He gathers the lambs in his arms

And carries them close to his heart

He gently leads those that have young.

Isaiah 40:11

Let the wild rumpus begin!

My kids dearly enjoy the book Where the Wild Things Are.   Some time ago when Saw Wayne was younger, I heard Sammy tell him “I’ll eat you up I love you so, Saw Wayne!”  So when the kids and I joined our ML group for the Lunch Bunch on Thursday at our local DQ, that is EXACTLY what that play room was like!  The Wild Rumpus had begun!  We had a great time and it was good to have intermittent conversations with my ML friends.

That afternoon, some sort of wild rumpus begin with my sinuses and Friday night I was in a full-blown sinus infection.  Sleeping (or not..) Friday night, I felt like a vice was on my head.  I am rarely, rarely, ever, ever sick.  Rarely. Ever.  But I have NEVER had a sinus headache like this one.  I could not find my “fun drops” that have a variety of homeopathic remedies the boys and I both use that are mixed by my dear Judy – who has no title, but essentially serves as our homeopathic/natural health practitioner.  But I couldn’t find my fun drops, which had helped one might with a minor sinus headache.  So until I found them, Father instructed me to put lavendar oil along my sinus cavities and then Arnica Cream on top of that.  This was SO HELPFUL.  SO HELPFUL.  Did I say it was SO HELPFUL?  I would wake up every 2 hours or less and do it again.  On one of those times, I was about to go to the car to check for my fun drops….and then decided to check the couch – and viola!  FUN DROPS!  So going to bed, I put one drop in my mouth every 5 minutes for 25 total minutes.  The next day after talking to Judy, I purchased some Nux Vomica and put that with Stramonium, which began to lessen the tension in my head – basically, my head began to relax.  Today I’ve added Ipecac, because yesterday evening I began coughing and weezing, with a tightness in my chest that is scarry when I try to lay down.  I’ve also tried a combo of 1 T. molasses, 1 T. Honey, squirt from 1/4 fresh lemon, pinch of chunk sea salt, and this helped as well until I could get to the Ipecac.  However, now I cannot find my Lavendar since Saturday morning.  Nowhere.  Looked everywhere.  Should have been sitting with my arnica cream – not there.   Bizarre.  He has a purpose, but I’d REALLY like my Lavendar back!

So to survive  thrive this evening with Tony gone to baseball security, I’m on the back patio these last 30 minutes before bedtime watching the boys play on the water slide.  My water bill should be quite interesting this month, but some things are necessary and worth paying for!

The mass exodus

I thought the “mass exodus” sounded like a great way to describe the continued flinging and purging of stuff going out of my home to get ready for our baseball player. 

The corner computer desk and lateral filing credenza – gone.  Cute bookshelf that sits atop 3 drawers – moved to corner of living room – cute!  My writing desk (from my Mom, made for her by her grandfather – pics to follow) – moved to the living room next to the TV armoir.  Looks great.  Especially with my fav blue/white lamp and my NEW laptop on it!  And all the junk off of it!  6 foot bookshelf – moved to living room (it will return to the room after bbp departs) – works.  This has all-thing-kids on it, books, playdoo, chalk, games, more books. 

The queen size bed is now in.  I dumped Saw’s clothes out of my grandmother’s dresser and he’ll have 1/2 the drawers under Sam’s captain’s bed.  This might be a good way to teach him to pick out his shorts/shirts.  Today all books in kids room went into a box for me to sort through (again!) and leave some out and store some under the captain’s bed, hopefully in an orderly fashion.  I saw a short shelf item at Hope’s Closet I kept looking at – now I know that I needed it! 

This afternoon Tony is having his Lt. badge pinned on him by ME!  The kids and I are swinging by Walmart to pick up a congratulations cake.  This evening we’ll attend his retiring boss’s party at Bodacious (sweet!). 

Whew!  I’m pooped!  I’ve had a 30 minute nap while putting the kids down and now it’s off to the showers. 

I’ve been concerned as the pressure is on and I keep working towards this mass exodus, that I’ve been mean/grumpy/fussy/unfair.  Sammy wasn’t kind to me and Saw yesterday on several occassions, so I took away our playtime at the spraypark this AM with his friend.  I’ve made him work alongside me this morning and when his attitude has not be right or he has not cooperated, he’s had to run laps.  So later I hugged him and told him I was sorry if mom was mean/grumpy/fussy (I didn’t offer him “unfair” as no use to give him further amunition!) – and he said “Mom, when have you been grumpy/mean/fussy?”  Really?  Whew!  I realized I was being to hard on myself.  He gave me a great big  hug and said I was the best mom ever.  Now that will keep me going!

Finding our happy face

Reading through my post on discovering the letter “S”, it reminded me of a cute Sammy story. 

It was last week sometime and he was having an attitude problem.  I think he’d already had to run laps that morning, probably for a bad attitude about chores.  Anyhow.  Whatever it was, I told him he might want to find his “happy face.”   And since my smile had left me because of his behavior, he thought I might need to find mine, too!

So when he woke up from his nap, he said “Guess what, Mom?  I found my happy face!  Know where it was?  On the snake down the road!  I did!  I went for a walk all by myself while you and Saw Wayne napped, and I found it!”  Died laughing, I did!  So I came back at him with, “Well guess what Sammy?  My happy face was on the squirrel!!!”  (See previous post to understand the humor!)

Yesterday when we were driving through the cave with the windows rolled down, he said “Momma!  I found me some joy!”  He makes my eyes cross sometimes, but I love that kid!